Was Mother Earth Goddess drunk?

Today we celebrate the spring equinox, the beginning of a new astrological year, a time when hope and creativity soar and our hearts beat to the rhythm of the Earth’s renewal. And we just pray to the Mother Earth Goddess that it doesn’t fucking snow again. Because...
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The Decafnation has left its sickly, lifeless existence behind

The Decafnation has left its sickly, lifeless existence behind and transported ourselves to an all-inclusive tropical oasis, where we can eat 15 meals a day and the steel drummers outnumber the the guests. We’ve traded our medical masks for scuba masks, and our serious hats for floppy hats.

So, while we enjoy a complimentary sunset and another free umbrella drink at the tiki bar, we suggest you endure the next two weeks of rain, snow and blustery winter nastiness by rereading every single word on the Decafnation website. We’ll be too busy eating to think of you, but have fun. See you on March 19.

Right now, we have to limber up for the fire-walking limbo contest.

Courtenay Mayor Larry Jangula pops his cork over the CVRD

Courtenay Mayor Larry Jangula exploded into an angry rant recently about wasteful spending at the Comox Valley Regional District. He’s not wrong.

For example, the CVRD plans to overspend on a number of patchwork sewerage system projects. It wants to build a controversial new pump station in Comox, when the CVRD’s own financial analysis shows that upgrading the Courtenay #1 pump station is the better and less expensive option. That alone could save millions of dollars.

CVRD data also shows that in the long-term it would be less expensive to expand the existing Comox pump station at Jane Place than build a second one.

And the CVRD has designed a system to replace the HMCS Quadra sewer outfall at a cost of more than $1.7 million dollars. The province’s most innovative septic system designer says the CVRD’s design is overbuilt, and estimates an alternative solution could cost less than a half-million dollars.

Taxpayers should ask their elected officials why they aren’t pressuring the CVRD to rein in these costs.

It’s immigrant entrepreneurs who make America great

According to the National Foundation for American Policy, immigrants are just as likely to be successful leaders in business as people born in the U.S.A.

The think tank says immigrants have founded close to half of the startup companies estimated to be worth more than $1 billion. That group includes Apple co-founder Steve Jobs, the son of a Syrian immigrant, and Sergey Brin, a refugee from the former Soviet Union, who co-founded Google.


Reason No. 1069 why we should start over on another planet

Princess Diana campaigned to ban land mines and to remove those left behind long after conflicts have ended. Former First Lady Michelle Obama promoted exercise and healthy diets to stem the growth of childhood obesity and early onset diabetes in America.

Melania Trump, on the other hand, sees her First Lady role as a money-making opportunity. She’s suing a British tabloid for $150 million because it reported that she had once worked for a modeling agency that was actually an escort service for wealthy men.

How did she justify the $150 million in damages? She claims the report has damaged her “opportunity … as an extremely famous and well-known person” to make millions of dollars selling jewelry, clothing and makeup while serving as “one of the most photographed women in the world.”

Lame Joke Du Jour

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, “My dog is cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?”
“Let’s have a look,” the vet says. He picks the dog up and carefully examines his left eye, then the right while holding him in the air. Finally, the vet says, “I’m going to have to put him down.”
“What? Just because he is cross-eyed?” the owner asks.
“No,” the vet says. “Because he is really, really heavy.”

Need a laugh? Check out our archive of lame jokes.

Thought Du Jour

“Birds sing after a storm; why shouldn’t people feel as free to delight in whatever remains to them?

– Rose Kennedy

About DecafNation

In a world already overpopulated with incivility, think of Decafnation as a refuge from high anxiety. Instead of a triple-shot, pulse boosting caffeine assault on your nervous system, our writing aims to give you the milder buzz of a decaffeinated beverage. But don’t let the coffee metaphor mislead you. You’ll find passionate writing and strong opinions here. The vision is to create a gracious space. A place where people can share well-considered commentary in a respectful atmosphere. Where readers are open to diverse ideas. Where people invite the stranger into their midst, regardless of race, religion, gender, sexual orientation or political sensibility.

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